The Secrets of Raising A Resilient Child
The Secrets of Raising A Resilient Child!
Life often throws us curveballs from time to time. This applies to both children as well as adults. But the ability to bounce back after falling down, to try again after failing, to get up and give it another shot is what resilience is all about. As parents, we want our children to be able to achieve anything that they set their heart on and for this, we must teach them how to be resilient.
Shanti Juniors believes one cannot possibly teach a child about resilience without expecting him/her to face failures and disappointments. So the next time your child faces failure or disappointment, let him/her talk about the feelings. Your children will feel a lot of emotions when they first face failure. Instead of asking them to grow up regarding the same, let them talk about their big feelings. Don’t try to talk them out, instead, empathize with them. All our crucial life lessons are learnt from experience. Let children experience that even though the failure feels like the end of the world, it is not so. There will be a new day and a new chance to try what they failed in the first place.
Being emotional is not a weakness. It is actually a strength. When kids feel overwhelmed by all these emotions, give them time. Research shows that kids who have a better ability to handle their emotions handle disappointment better compared to kids who aren’t able to regulate their emotions. Allow and accept all emotions, even if it momentary alters the child’s behaviour. Show your children that all emotions are acceptable and that they do not have to be ashamed if they feel emotional.
Shanti Juniors believes, as parents, you have to offer encouragement, no doubts about that. But you have to do it in a limit. If we give too much praise, we might hamper them from learning regarding criticism and how to take this criticism in their stride. Instead of telling your child he/she did a good job, even if she didn’t, praise the effort. Tell your children that you see and value the honest effort made by them and then tell them how they can do better next time.
Lastly, have realistic expectations. Make goals more attainable and not far-fetched that are impossible to achieve. If the goal is too big for a child, break it into parts so that your child doesn’t give up mid way itself. Moreover, breaking the task into smaller goals or parts increases the times your child will achieve these small goals before finally achieving the big goal. These small wins will only motivate the child to do more, to do better. And a little motivation is what all of us can use from time to time right?
As parents, you cannot protect your child from uncertain rains. What you can do is empower them to wade through their way, show them where they can find an umbrella and raincoat and help them become strong enough to bear the storm accompanying the rains. When your child grows up and realizes all the hurdles he/she made the way through and won, he/she will realize that it was only your love, support and teachings that made it all possible.
Teach your child that life has no limitations except the ones we make.